Burning Questions Re: Another Cinderella Story

Two and a half years ago, I moved away from home to New York City. I didn't know a soul. Fast forward to now, I live in Hell's Kitchen with two roommates and every day is a new adventure. I am doing this blog to recap silly things that happen to me each day.

4.18.16
8:23 PM

Let's be real. Another Cinderella Story staring Jane Lynch, Selena Gomez, and Drew Seely is basically a cinematic masterpiece. (No judgments please). I am watching it right now, actually! But, it leaves open some burning questions.

1. Why does Selena Gomez have to dance in a room all by herself while all the other lesser dancers get to dance in a group?

Why does everyone else not get to revel in the glory?

2. HOW are the step-sisters popular and Selena Gomez is not? The step-sisters are creepy and dumb and mouth-breathers!!!

HOW!?

3. At the ball, how does Joey Parker not recognize Mary? It's not like they'd never spoken before! Plus, Mary's mask isn't that big.


4. Most importantly so far, where do I find a friend like Tammy? I needed someone to redo my entire closet with handmade originals, like yesterday. Plus, she always stands up for Mary and is a 10 for loyalty.

Look at that attack face though.

5. Why was Joey such a jerkface when Mary tried to explain who she was? ON 2 SEPERATE OCCASIONS! WHO BLOWS SELENA GOMEZ OFF???? YES IT'S TOO LATE TO SAY SORRY.

</3 So many feelings regarding this.

6. How is Mary's bedroom so nice and neat?

I have two loving parents and my room is not nearly this cool. Mary only has Jane Lynch (not that she's not fantastic) who does not necessarily play a maternal role, but her room looks like that!?

7. I don't have a picture of this, and I realize the whole point of the competition is so Mary can win, but for real, can't those first break dancers at the beginning of the competition get some kind of honorable mention?

8. Again, no picture, but how did the step-sisters suck so bad at dancing after they took all those fancy classes and were not nearly as bad there?

9. How do Joey and Mary have this entire dance perfect when they weren't even speaking to choreograph it?

How can they look so happy when they were just so mad at each other at the beginning of the song!?
In the same vain, how does Mary know all the words?

10. Lastly, where do I sign up?